Self

I have recently been engaged in a deadly battle with self. I have never thought of myself as a me centered person merely because I have never had anything but the lowest opinion of myself. I have always been somewhat of a doormat to others especially my family (parents, brothers and sister) I am daily consumed with thoughts about my inadequacies: "I am not pretty enough," I am not smart enough," "I am not thin enough," "I am not a good enough Christian," "I am not a good enough wife'" "I am not a good enough mother," "I am not a good enough homemaker" etc.

Tonight I realized that all of these thoughts are not only me-centered they are extremely and entirely toxic. I have let myself come between me and God, I have entriely let go of my quiet times reading and meditating on the Word and I have let go of prayer outside of mealtimes and prayer time with the kids. I have become so wrapped up in where I fail that I am blocking out the One who can rescue me from this pit of self pity.

I am writing this tonight with three direct purposes: first to all of my dear friends to whom I have become a negative person so down on life and distracted by self that I have begun to be a burden I sincerely and humbly apologize; second I am asking for prayers, encouragement, and mostly accountability as I embark on a mission to die to self and focus on the Lord first, family second, home third, and others fourth, putting my selfish attitudes completely out of my life and behind me; third to become the person, servant, wife, mother, etc that God has planned and designed me to be.

Thank you all for putting up with me as I have been such a selfish whinny brat!!!

"and He was saying to them all, "If anyone wishes to some after Me, he must deny himself, take up his cross daily and follow Me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake, he is the one who shall save it." Luke 9:23-24 (NASB)

Potty Training Chornicles Vol 2 ... HE DID IT!!!

Just as I had begun to lose myself in the endless monotony of heading to the bathroom every 15 minutes with no success, HE DID IT!!!!!! Of course it happened while I was away, Aaden went to his daddy said "potty time" and proceeded to use the potty for both #1 and #2 all on his own!!! And he has done it again and again and again.

I would not say that he is completely potty trained, I still have him in pull-ups to sleep and when we leave the house. He has however been having dry nap times and has stayed dry on many outings this week! He has even used to potty many different places away from home.

I wish I could claim this as a success for me but I can't. When it comes time to do this again I will be just as clueless!! Maybe I will finally learn the secret next time, ironically next time will be my last time. For now I will savor the thought of only having one child in diapers; thankfully I have never had three in diapers but this will be the first time in almost 6 years I will have only one in diapers.

Chronicles of Potty Training vol1

When I first learned I was pregnant with my first child the very first though I had was "I am going to have to potty train this child!" and I was literally terrified. My first attempt at potty training was a disaster, it took a full year to get him peeing and pooping on the potty and controlling himself through the day and the night. My second try was much better, however not because of anything I did. God blessed me with a child who potty trained himself in less than a two weeks; he was not even three yet and was staying dry both day and night and completely potty trained all on his own. Then I had to start all over, my daughter is very strong willed and was determined not to let the potty training be easy, but finally after a year of struggling she was potty trained. Now here I am again, fourth time around and still no clue!

Aaden's surgery was a tremendous success and he healed exceptionally quickly, as is a family trait, and he has expressed a desire in using the potty. His exact words were "big boy, potty now" he then jumped up ran to his room grabbed his Lightning McQueen underwear and went to sit on the potty. Nothing happened. He sat on the potty five more times that night, wore his big boy underwear around the house, and just before bedtime...had an accident. "That's okay," I said "Potty goes in the potty, not on Lightning." I put him in a diaper and put him to bed.

We are now three days into our potty training adventure and he has spent a great deal of time sitting on the potty and peeing in his underwear. I am going to have to put this one in God's hands. I have no clue what I am doing and I have done this before, I have read the books, I know most of the methods inside and out, I have exhausted them on the other kids. I still have no idea how to get this task accomplished.

I guess I will have to take this one day at atime. Besisdes no one goes to kindergarten in diapers... right???????????

Lessons form The Little House

Recently my children and I have enjoyed watching re-runs of Little House on the Prairie, a show I missed out on as a child but I loved reading the books. My younger ones lose interest pretty quickly but RJ and Jakob really love it. I wish there were still shows on TV worth watching as much as this one is (however I must admit I enjoy watching some shows I know are not worth my time) My favorite thing about the show is the portrayal of the family the way God intended and it makes me long for this family structure not only on TV but in every household. The marriage is strong, the father is the head of the family, the children are obedient and hard working, but most importantly the family is centered and founded in God, faith, and the Bible.

As much as I love the Ingalls and now the Wilders I have to admit that we have learned the most form the Oelson's. Yes I have made it a requirement for my children to answer me with a yes ma'am and I am working on their respect for all adults; we are all learning much stronger lessons from the Oelsons. These are the what not to do lessons. My children get very upset at the way Mrs. Oelson treats her husband so I have begun to become very aware of how I treat and respond to my husband. I have been learning to respect him more even when I don't feel like it, because it is important for me to follow God's Word and it is equally important for my kids to see me following God's Word. My children are learning why they don't get everything they want, why they get punished and why they treat people in a kind loving respectful way. Noone wants to be a Nellie or a Nancy Oelson!

It is refreshing to see such great programing was at one time allowed on TV with a real reverence for the Lord and His Teachings, but I pray for this kind of family to become the norm throught America and the world!

Surgery

I must start out with an apology to my readers, I realize it has been a very long time since my last post and I apologize for that. I have been having severe joint pain and stiffness in my fingers and wrists making it rather difficult to blog regularly.

Yesterday was a big first for me as a mom, my two year old had surgery. Granted it was a minor out-patient procedure I have known was coming since his birth, yet it was still an experience for me. My mom and I drove him down to the Children's Hospital in Aurora early in the morning; he was still rather sleepy and although I had told him he was going to have surgery I know he had no idea what was coming. After being stuck in stand-still traffic on I-25, we arrived 30 minutes late and still they got us right back to pre-op with no wait. God had blessed us with a cancellation in the surgery schedule so we got through the check-in and pre-op process in less than 45 minutes, we had planned on a two hour wait between check in at 8:15 and surgery at 10:15. The surgeon came in to talk to us about the procedure, followed by the LPN, three Anesthesiologists, and the nurse who would be assisting and we were off; my mom and I put on our lovely white paper suits, blue hats and masks and my little man walked right into the OR with no hesitation or fear. He looked so samll to me laying there on that table. He didn't even fight the anesthetic mask, he laid there holding my hand took a few breaths and drifted off. Then I had to leave him in the care of these strangers who would be operating on him.

After a surprisingly good cafeteria breakfast, some light chatting with my mom and a little knitting, they were ready to let me go back to him while he woke up. As I listenined to young childrenand babies waking up in recovery, screaming like I have never heard, I waited anxiously for my little guys eyes to open, thanking God the surgrey had gone exceptionally well, he had not been afraid, there had been no drama, I quietly prayed that he would wake up just as well. And he did! Not one tear, not even a grimmace or a whimper. He woke up quietly drank some juice and we were on our way home an hour later. throughout the evening he just amazed me with his resillience, by 4:00 you would have never guessed he'd had anything done at all, he was up running around happy as can be.

God worked so many things together yesterday, I am in awe that He would so intricately orchestrate such a simple thing. Not only did He show His hand in how well the surgery and recovery went (and are still going as there is no swelling or bruising and Aaden is in no pain at all) but He made the surgery on a Wednesday, Sean had off, and the big boys were at day camp. Sean only had to stay with the girls and they gave him a pretty rough time, but God knew how much Sean could take and arranged for me to get home early and take over.

What a mighty God we serve!

Totally Amazing; He Really Gets It

Last night our family attended a concert put on by the group Children of the World; they were orphans from Uganda with some of the most beautiful music, and heartbreaking testimonies I have ever heard. After the concert we got a chance to visit with these precious children. Their smiles were so warm and they were captivated both by my little blond haired blue eyed baby (and the fact that she has no teeth) and the Dr. Suess book she was holding. They took the book and began devouring it as if they had never seen a Dr. Suess book before; they stood in a little huddle all taking turns reading the strange sounds of Fox in Socks a couple times over.

Jakob was struck by their interest in reading and he gathered his four favorite Dr. Suess books we had in the van and gave them to these children. I had been feeling a bit guilty and ashamed that we had nothing to give these children when they took up a love offering, and that we walked by the sponsership table without being able to stop and sign up. I felt worthless as if we had nothing to give; but my seven year old son knew better. He knew that true giving is not measured by a dollar amount it is measured in your heart. He gave these children a true a heartfelt gift that they cherished. Now I realize it will not help the millions of children orphaned and abandonned in Africa; but it will bring some joy to the small group of children traveling around america for the first time, and they will be able to take the books back to the other children at the orphanage in Uganda and share the fun of Dr. Suess.

In a completely separate moment, Jakob and I had run to the store for some food for our new kitten and had parked next to a car with an RMHS Lobos sticker and he asked me what a Lobo was so we started talking about wolves. After talking about how sometimes wolves will kill a farmer or ranchers sheep he was very quiet for a little while then he said, "Mommy, Satan and his demons are a lot like wolves because they like to kill and destroy Gods sheep. But He is our shepherd and He protects us"

It was a great night for me as a mom; as he said those words I knew that I have set his little feet on the right path, the path that leads to his Heavenly Father. In those two instances, I saw his heart and heard his faith; I said to myself the struggle is worth it. I have been feeling pretty low as a mother and as a person for the last few months, I have been feeling like a failure but last night God used my son to show me that we are on the right path as long as we obey and follow Him in everything we do; including and especially raising our kids. He also showed me that feeling sorry for myself is no way to get out of this funk, prayer and trusting in Him through this season of struggle will get me through. If I humble myself, work hard, deny myself, take up my cross, and follow Him; I will be able to lead my children to Him as well. That should be my priority as a mother, not being super mom.

And to think I learned all that from my kid!!!!

What did you get for Mothers Day?

"What did you get/do for Mothers Day?" will be tomorrows most frequently asked question; while I spent most of today moping about how this mothers day will for sure be the same as the past seven, only acknowledged by my children and their Sunday School class gifts, God spoke to my heart about what Mothers Day should really be about for me. I spent so much time today sulking in self pity that I missed several opportunities to spend quality time with my children; to add insult to injury I am well aware of my children's love languages, two of my children are quality time. In the quiet time after the kids were in bed I listened to what God had been trying to say all day, while my inner complaining was drowning Him out

"Behold, children are a gift of the Lord, the fruit of the womb is a great reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of ones youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them; They will not be ashamed when they speak with their enemies at the gate." Psalm 127:3-5

The first word in this passage is "Behold;" God is really trying to get my attention. He wants me to put aside all my selfish whining and listen to Him. I had felt Him tugging at my heart all day, but I was too lost in moping, as well as the five little hands tugging at me all day, to listen. When I read those words tonight, it was like a slap in the face; somewhat like a movie or T.V. show where someone is slapped and they say "thanks, I needed that." Needless to say I immediately came to attention.

"Children are a gift of the Lord" Do I really need any gifts, flowers, or anything else for mothers day? No, my gift is being a mother. Not only do I get to be a mother, I get to be the mother of five amazing, beautiful, talented, unique children. Are they difficult? Yes. Are they wild, rowdy, and ornery? Yes. Do they test my limits? Daily. Are they an incredible blessing? No question!! Could I ask for anything more? Never. God has definitely filled our quiver. I am so thoroughly ashamed of my moping over the lack of worldly, material gifts when I am surrounded by treasure.

What did I get for Mother's Day? I have been given, by my Heavenly Father, the unbelievable opportunity to raise five children in His Name, to train up a generation that fears, loves, and serves the Lord. I have been given five little people to love, play with, read to, draw with, explore with, cry with, watch over, sing to/with, dance with, serve with, and grow with. Nothing could ever top this gift, and I get to receive it every minute of every day. How blessed am I?

An Exercise in Bonding

Recently I have been on a relentless quest to lose the last remaining excess pounds of baby weight, and hopefully tones and tighten up this baby belly. Having no time or money to join a gym or fitness club I do what I can from home. I don't diet but I eat healthy, I walk the kids to and from school (for us that's 3 times a day,) and I work out at home every day. Being rather shy and reserved I tend to do my workouts after everyone's in bed so no one will be watching; this week however my routine was shaken up.

After dinner Monday night, my children asked if they could do my workout too, I was reluctant but they asked so sweetly I couldn't turn them down. I turned on a family program I thought would be pretty easy and fun for everyone and we started off. Aaden and Cadi lost interest after about five minutes and left the room to play, Jakob and RJ, however, did just about the whole program; I was so proud of them, as it turned out the program was not easy and we all worked pretty hard.

We had so much fun together that night that we tried it again yesterday morning, I haven't let them in on my toning days but I'm thinking I might, they make exercise so much fun it just doesn't seem like a chore when we do it together. I spend a great deal of time with my kids; meeting their needs, playing games, reading, playing in the yard, teaching, etc.; I never seem to spend time together working towards a common goal and encouraging each other to accomplish it. I have really been missing out. When we set out on a mission to exercise together an activity that had always been solitary became a team effort; we were on a mission to get to the end without quitting or cutting corners, and we were in it together.

Working together to finish the whole program,and do the routine well was more than great exercise, it was bonding. By the end we were tired, sweaty, and thirsty; as we all collapsed on the floor together with our water bottles my kids said they never knew exercise was so much fun. Neither did I.

The End?????

I have, residing in my home, a real-live, genuine "walk"-star. My baby has learned the fine art of walking; in the span of three short weeks she has gone from taking two shaky steps to freely exploring the world on her own two feet. This new accomplishment has opened many new doors to her and has marked the end of an era for me. I realized today that my days of caring for an infant are officially over; my baby days are done. I have to admit I am tearing up as I write this and have been agonizing over this day since the final weeks of my final pregnancy. A very good friend welcomed a new baby girl to her family today as I said goodbye to my baby stage of mothering; it is a bittersweet day for me. As I painstakingly close the book on my last child's infancy, I rejoice with my friend as she finally meets her long awaited baby girl (the third child in their family, first girl)

I have spent the last seven years of my life carrying, birthing, nursing, and caring for my five "babies" and now I hardly know what to do with myself; I feel as though I have lost a part of my identity, I don't know who I am not expecting or caring for a new baby. Through the pain, however, I feel a sense of peace; I feel my family is complete and it is time to start a new journey in parenting. I have never dealt with change and endings well; I do not welcome new challenges and I recoil in the face of changes. Now, standing at the threshold of a major change I feel strong and encouraged; I know who laid the plans and I trust Him completely.

I may have made the choices that led me to where I am, having a baby then another and another and son and so forth; put God laid the plans for my life long before I was born "My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth; Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; and in your book were written all the days that were ordained for me, when as yet there was not one of them." Psalm 139:15-16 (NASB)Through my inner turmoil I can hear His voice telling me this is not an ending but an exciting new beginning that He has planned for me and I will be okay because I have put my life and my identity into His hands. I am not defined by my children but by my Father, my heavenly Father.

He has laid a plan for me, He is the captain on my new journey. As I put this stage behind me, I begin a new journey; a journey with full nights of sleep, a journey with diminishing diaper duty, a journey full of "firsts" and endless possibilities. This day I have dreaded and agonized over has become an exciting new adventure in mothering; and a daunting responsibility. This is where the real work begins; the work of character building, discipline, training, and, if done right, unfathomable rewards as I watch my children grow in the Lord and walk in His ways.

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.'" Jer 29:11-13 God has a plan for me and I welcome it. I may battle the sadness every now and then, but I bubble over with joy as I look to the future; I can't wait to hear Emery's first prayer, to watch my children go into the waters of baptism, to see them develop their gifts and talents to serve and glorify him, to teach them his ways and watch them grow in their relationships with their Lord and Savior.

This is not the end, it is a bright and wonderful beginning.

New Blog

I have started a new blog; it is called Daily Bread and is a daily scripture study. I will be taking one book at a time, beginning with Ephesians, one verse at a time and blogging the reflections the Holy Spirit lays on my heart. I will continue with this blog as well so please keep checking here. Please check out my new blog and leave your comments, I love peoples input and feedback !! http://candice-dailybread.blogspot.com/

Reclaiming the Sabbath step 1: Work and Play day Saturday

Over the last few months I have been trying to buckle down and reclaim Sunday as a day of rest, reflection, and worship; all day not jut an hour or two in the morning. The biggest obstacle was having been so busy during the week that all the household chores seemed to pile up and I would spend most of Sunday getting things done and focusing on getting ready for Monday. That is not how i wish to spend my one day of rest a week; nor is it a way to honor God who gave me one day to rest and recharge for the week. the problem remained, what could I do, I am a busy mom even on days when we don't go anywhere; I always have someone needing something and four other someones getting in to something how am I supposed to get anything done?

In January I instituted Play and Work day Saturday. As soon as breakfast is finished on Saturday morning we all sit down and make three lists together, a list of kids jobs, a list of adult jobs, and a list of playtime ideas. I cut the list to separate the jobs and put each list into it's own bowl; then we each draw a job from the appropriate bowl. I put on some upbeat music and we start our tasks. The rule is once you finish your job you help someone else, when that task is complete you help someone else and so on and so forth until every ones task has been completed. This is where it gets fun!!! We keep score on the giant dry-erase board in the kitchen; 1 point for completing your own task, and 2 points for any job you help complete. After three draws the one with the most points gets to chose out of the playtime bowl and we take 30 minutes to play together as a family, then we start all over.

Typically we will work all day and there will still be a few little things left on the adult list but the house is nearly clean and I am ready to focus on what the Sabbath is really about. As an added bonus we are spending an entire day together as a family accomplishing a common goal; the kids are learning the importance of teamwork and helping each other which is already starting to strengthen their sibling bonds. Occasionally we will have a day this does not work out perfectly, they fight, or refuse to do their tasks; it is however over all a really great strategy for getting the family together, and getting the job done

Pressure

I would like to start off by apologizeing that it has been over a month since I last posted here. I have been completely wrapped up in the things of theis life;: laundry, dishes, cleaning, cooking, children, etc. Couple all that with a severe case of bloggers block and i just had to take some time away from writting for a while

I have been meaning to get back to writing for a while but I just couldn't come up with anything I fewlt was blog worthy; after a few weeks I started wondering why I couldn't come up with anything and I realized I had been putting too much pressure on myself to write deeply profound, insightful and inspirational blogs every time. I just can't live up to that. I started this blog to be a real look into the trenches of Christian mothering and anyone who is or ever has been in my shoes knows that in the life of a mother the most profound thing you hear or say in a day has to do with the color or shape of something. 

So I have decided to let go of the desire to be deep, profound, insightful, and inspiring and re-commit myself to my original purpose:to be real and encouraging.

Ahhh...Refreshment

Today was a great day!!! I began as I begin all mornings; I do not let my feet touch the floor before I pray. I instructed my children to do their "first chores" the morning ritual of making beds, picking up toys, and putting away laundry folded the night before while I do my morning workout. My husband came home, gave us all hugs and went directly to bed as per usual after a night shift. I made one change in our morning routine and I believe it made all the difference in our day. I moved our Bible lesson and main prayer time from before bed to before breakfast.

There is just something refreshing about beginning the day in the Word and in prayer. It is like setting a force-field of protection around my heart and mind that lasts all day. We were all more relaxed, loving, kind, and patient all day. From there I made another small change; I decided my work could wait until after school when we all do chores and I spent the morning playing with my kids, taking a break to engage in a refreshing and encouraging phone conversation with a friend.

There is just something refreshing about spending time with friends. I have been taking more time to spend with my sisters in Christ lately and I have noticed a direct effect on my mood. God designed us to need each other "Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their labor, for if either of them falls the one will lift up his companion. but woe to the one who falls and there is not another to lift him up. Furthermore, if two lie down together they can keep warm, but how can one be kept warm alone? And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart." Ecc 4:9-12 (NASB) and to crave His word "Like newborn babes, long for the pure milk of the word, that by it you may grow in respect to salvation" 1 Peter 2:2 (NASB)

I have found that when I let the Word guide me, spend more time in heartfelt prayer, and take time with Christian friends I am refreshed, refilled and ready to fill and nurture my family. If I allow myself to get empty I get into trouble because I can't give what I do not have. I have to have the Word of God locked in my heart (Ps 119:11) so I may raise my kids according to the Word, I have to be full of Gods love so that I may pour it out on my children and so fill them up as well.

I Just Lost It

Tonight I will be spending a lot of time in prayer seeking forgiveness and guidance. I just lost it with my kids tonight. I don't know how it started or why I got so angry and frustrated; we were having a great day, then we had dinner. Dinner, as per usual, did not turn out the way I had planned; my husband started his week of night shifts tonight so I was a little rushed in getting everything ready on time. I had cooked ribs all day in the crock pot, however upon cutting them for the kids we discovered they were still not completely cooked; we were out of time so I had to throw them back in and make sandwiches. My husband left in the middle of dinner and chaos ensued; I had a crying baby, an obstinate toddler, a defiant three year old, a wild five year old, and a first grader with two days of make-up work to do (because his absent minded mother forgot to pick it up on Friday)

In short I was completely overwhelmed; I had too much noise, and too much commotion to handle. I gave everyone a task to do thinking it would calm things down while I got the baby settled and in bed, I was wrong. I did get the baby settled and in bed, but I came up the stairs to find more noise, and more commotion than I had left. Coloring supplies were strewn wildly about the floor, volcano worksheets looked as if they had been thrown from a volcano all over the table, and a race was taking place from the living room around through the kitchen. The tasks of cleaning up bedrooms had not been completed after four little voices had assured me they were finished and I could not handle it.

I just lost it. I yelled at my four sweet little blessings. I am not a yeller and I am always heartsick when I see and hear parents yelling at their children; yet tonight I yelled at my children. After calming myself down a little we got the volcano worksheets completed, placed in the homework folder and the folder into the back-pack; I cleaned up from dinner; and we got the bedrooms picked up. I got their teeth brushed, their jammies on, and we all piled onto my daughters bed for our Bible time. I thought things were looking up, Bible time is everyones favorite time of day, it doesn't matter what time we do our Bible time itis always a good time. Not tonight, they were all just too squirly, they wouldn't sit still, they wouldn't leave wach other alone, they would not stop fighting. I had to cut our time short and put them all to bed early; no hot chocolate date tonight, a tearful repentent prayer time with each child and an early bed time.

I hate the way things went tonight, I hate that I yelled at them, I hate that we cut our Bible time short, I hat e that I had to take away my son's alone time with me. But I love that I learned something about God's mercy and grace tonight. I am a flawed individual, and even though I try to appear perfect to my kids I am anything but. I can only parent these children through the grace of God, I can only give them what I receive from Him. I can only teach them repentence if I am willing to do it. I failed miserably at being a good mother tonight, but in the morning (because they are all asleep now) I will excell at showing them a repentent sinner. I will show them a Biblical modle of asking forgiveness when I apologize for my wrongs and ask their forgiven. I will show them my dependenc on an need for God when I pray for His wisdom and guidance throughout the day. Finally I will be able to show them what it is like to allow God to teach and guide us through our mistakes as I stop to pray before I lose it te next time things get out of control or anytime I need to discipline them. I will show them I can't be the mom He wants me to be if I am not following His teachings and constantly in prayer.

New Year, New Me

The beginning of a new year is a time when many of us begin to asses the changes we would like to make in our lives to make this year better than last. It is a time when we are bombarded with commercials selling a beautiful new image; new clothes, diet plans, gym memberships, new cars, new home theater, new furnishings, new status symbols. As a I sit here 10 months after the birth of a baby it is really easy to look at myself through the worlds eyes and not like what I see. When I first sat down to make me resolutions for the new year weight loss and a new wardrobe to make me feel better about myself were the first things that came to mind; then a Sunday morning sermon entitled The Real Thing changed my mind.

I have put a lot of my value as a person into my outward appearance, and have long felt that I don't and never would have much value in this world if that was my only measuring stick. After really looking into the words of a favorite scripture passage I have changed my view not only of myself but of beauty itself.

"and let not your adornment be merely external braiding the hair and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God" 1 Peter 3:3-4 (NASB)

After examining this scripture I have come up with a list of resolutions for the coming year that will really improve who I am; better and more permanently than any diet plan ever could.

My Resolutions For 2009

• Daily prayer, and meditaiton on Scripture
• Listen more, talk less
• Teach my Children to love the Word of God
• Focus on the inner person, making sure I have a quiet and gentle spirit
• Completely cut out my residual and perpetual sins
• Focus on the blessings my children really are
• Reclaim the Sabbath as Holy to the Lord
• Really dedicate myself to the task of raising Godly children
• Let go of the demands and expectations of the world to live in the fullness of the Lord
• Learn my worth in Christ, let got of my worthlessness in the world
• Establish relationships that are the Real Thing

Please hold me accountable and ask me how these are going, it may seem like a daunting list but if I focus mainly on my realtionship with Christ I know all the rest will fall into place.

"I can do all things through him who strengthens me" Phil 4:13 (NASB)